Narcissism

There is an immense amount of published material on this topic. It is important to know about the phenomenon of narcissism both to keep our own minds in good health and also to protect ourselves from others exhibiting narcissistic traits. Clearly we live in an age in which an individual can easily obsess about his of her image and feed this obsession through use of social media.

A key characteristic of narcissism is the desperate need to maintain a false self based on others' perceptions which is at odds with his or her own self image. It is often said that many narcissists are suffering from poor self esteem which is the result of childhood trauma or abuse. Another key characteristic of the narcissist is the exploitation of others for personal gain which results in dysfunctional personal relationships and results in difficulty maintaining both friendships and romantic relationships. This aspect of narcissism seems to result from being obsessed about personal gain whilst lacking empathy. Whilst a healthy empathic person might focus on the benefits of cooperation the narcissist will have a tendency to see others as competitors and/or a source of supply. Clearly it is possible to have some narcissistic characteristics without being an extremely toxic exploitative person.

If you have the ability to identify your own narcissistic traits and work to remove them then you can prevent some of the worst consequences for your self and those you are in close relationships with. Personal control is key! An obvious point is that the extent of our self absorption and propensity to experience and act on empathy has a neurological basis. A person who is on the autistic spectrum might be expected to be more vulnerable to suffering from an inability to empathise with others.

Narcissists are often divided into two categories: vulnerable and grandiose. A vulnerable narcissist is in a state where the imminent collapse of their personality and lifestyle is a frequent threat: such a person has limited achievements and position in life. A grandiose narcissist whilst still battling to maintain a false self has achieved more success both financially and personally; such an individual could have a senior position in an organisation.

Finally of course there is the clinical definition of NPD or narcissistic personality disorder which is defined by psychologists and psychiatrists. As with many aspects of psychological health clearly a large amount of psychological dysfunction is undiagnosed.

One key to great psychological well being is empathy! Surely this something we all need to remind ourselves of every day!